autumn II [fairy autumn]

i call this "my valentine tree" because the leaves blush like sunkissed lovers.

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for time-defying romance & a painfree lesson in patience, either sit, stand or lie under an autumn tree. you can

(a) play a game of "catch a ray of sun on your tongue"

(b) let the tree paint maps on your skin with sun & everchanging foil

or (c) when the amber leaves rain down, see how many surprise you with a wayward kiss

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you fill me with glee

my valentine tree

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if you dance on a carpet of fallen leaves, you'll find that you never dance alone. just imagine a fairy under each leave...

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...& in the golden forrest i find solace & peace
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when i look at this photograph, it feels like i'm floating under the water, looking up at the trees & the branches run like veins through a sea of leaves...
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autumn is a time to find your inner fairy

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(C) Photographs & words, MJ Calitz, 2009

autumn I [pumpkins & leaves]

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For the next 3 days this blog will be all about autumn. yellows & ambers in layers of lacy color both brilliant & subtle, fairy footsteps in forrests & sun on leaves. i hope it makes you want to curl up in a sunny spot, eat bowls full of sweet cinnamon-y pumpkin & smile inside.

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(C)Photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

take a bite

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these are not the best pictures because some images just doesn't photograph well. but i still wanted to share them. [click on images to enlarge and see more detail.]

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the top piece was the main idea. it started with copying a random page from the dictionary. this page was all about fruit. and the word "forbidden" jumped out at me. i also loved the illustrations on the page. so i attached the copied page to 8x10 canvas board. then i layered paint, string and more paper (including more photocopies, a chocolate wrapper & facial tissue paper). this piece is about forbidden fruit, temptation, contrast (sensuality & decay, promises & lies, weakness & strength, healthy & sinful), secrets, consequences, layers, movement.

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the other piece that you see in the picture below, in contrast, is all about simplicity. it's honest, transparent & static. what you see is what you get. and it's just pink & yellow left over paint from the first piece that i swept roughly over a clean canvas board and didn't over work.

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i think they make a pretty pair. so now the question is...to frame or not to frame. i'm thinking maybe bold white frames.

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(C) Art, MJ Calitz, 2009

what you carry

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that cross that you're always carrying with you…
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do you remember why you (chose to) carry it?
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is it still necessary for your survival, or does it hurt you now?
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and if it was really made out of stone and just as heavy physically as it is emotionally, would you still be carrying it today?
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why don't you put it down?
you'll be okay.
i promise.
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ps. i found this angel yesterday at a nearby graveyard and instantly loved her.
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(C) Photograph, MJ Calitz, 2009

come again

I didn't think people visited here…No that's not entirely true. I have some darling friends that still believe in me in spite of the fact that I'm moving as slow as a snail to become the artist inside. And every so often they let me know that they "see me". And so I know that they drop in and I cherish that. A lot. But I didn't know that strangers sometimes visit my blog and come back for more. That gave me a little pause today. Wow. I kinda feel a little responsible now. To produce and grow. But you know what. I wouldn't be doing anyone a favor by pushing myself too hard. That would only make me creep back into my shell. So, this is me, just saying thank you to all my friends and everyone else who visit here. Your interest and positive energies make a difference in my life. Thank YOU. sO much.
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Here's a piece I finished last week. I call it "butterfly tree."
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I started with an 11 x 14 inch piece of corrugated cardboard. I randomly swiped acrylic paint mixed with glazing medium over the surface with a credit card. Then I painted a black tree skeleton and layered it with black lace cut to fit. At this point I glued the cardboard to a similar sized piece of hardboard for support (two holes drilled at the top). I cut out two butterflies and a daisy from scrapbook paper and painted them with gloss gel (both sides). I printed a cropped photograph (self portrait) and did the same thing. Then I added these 4 pictures to my tree. It still needed something, so I took beads in complementing colors, wrapped them with wire and added them to the tree like fruit. As finishing touches I added black cut outs to the 4 corners and lastly I punched the two holes through the cardboard and added bolts, nuts and wire so the piece can be hanged. [click on pic to enlarge]
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& the symbolism behind it all: the tree is me (complete with arms & head disappearing into & becoming branches. no legs, since the tree's roots are my legs). the flower symbolizes my soul bursting forth…refusing to be boxed in. the butterflies symbolize all the beautiful souls send on my path to teach me, carry me, love me. the beads are the fruit I bear (or wish to bear). And they are wrapped in wire like little gifts…or because i sometimes feel constrained. Or just because I can. The orange, white and blue paint symbolize my heritage. (I'm South African by birth and those three colors were the original colors of our national flag. It has changed since. But it will always remind me of that flag and where I come from). The curly cut outs symbolize both space and time both here and not here and this is important because it's always in the corners of my mind. the hardware I used to hang the piece, is all about being tough vs. the fragile lace.
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And then this poem:
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autumn day. the cold crawls into her body like insects looking for warmth entering through every open door as if her heart is a house. no. she's a tree. maybe there is a house. somewhere. but she. is. a tree. growing roots & branches & leaves and occasionally fruit. why does she feel like she needs to bear fruit to be a tree? pretty fruit. lots of fruit. fruit ripening & falling on the ground fruit. it's weighing her down a little that she's not one of those trees. yet. more sun. more sun & water & love. & maybe one day she'll bear her fruit with pride
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tHanKs foR visitinG. pLease coMe aGaiN
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(C) Art & Poetry, MJ Calitz, 2009

barely here

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so where DID my words go? i guess i'm going through a silent phase right now. i haven't written a lot of poems the last month or so and the few i wrote, were either too private or too raw to share here. honestly though, i don't think it's that you couldn't handle reading it...but more that i couldn't handle it being read. sometimes you just got to listen to your soul and give it a little down time. not so in the spotlight all the time. not so vulnerable & exposed. sometimes you got to focus on other things. like finding your inner artist. even though others might not see it. might not believe it. might not support it. sometimes you just gotta let go of that fear and all those expectations and anything else that keeps you away from your dreams. and be you. without apology. so this is me, not apologising. this is me blowing you a kiss and saying "don't worry, i didn't forget you."

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this piece will be part of a long term project. i've shifted from paper towels to using muslin squares to clean and blot paint brushes, which makes for awesome & spontaneous little collages infused with whatever i'm feeling at that moment. i'm thinking a little fabric art book or maybe an art quilt. time will tell. this one is a combination of acrylic paints, bronze glaze, gloss gel and permanent markers as well as papers, ribbons, lace & metal elements. here's the fun part: these are supposed to be imperfect & experimental, not only allowing me to learn as i go, but also to add character and personality. why not. i will share more in future.

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be well

mj

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

amber light

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the warm colors of autumn flowers, the way the light kiss the petals and even when half the film is blurred...there's something about these pictures that speaks to my soul...

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(C) Photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

square cocoon

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how funny is it that i made this and realized afterwards that i find myself in a square cocoon of my own making?

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how to: i started with 8x8 canvasboard, added layers of tissue paper and paint and stiched a paper napkin square with butterfly motif to a square of muslin (the sides unravelled). i then added cardboard, a poem, threads & washers, glued the top two layers to the cavasboard (adding 3 ribbons secured between the layers to hang it) and finished the piece with touches of paint, gold gel pen & beads.

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

red barn

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(C) Photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

both & everything between

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sometimes my heart is smashed

sometimes my heart is green

and sometimes my heart is both

and everything between

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(C) photograph & verse, MJ Calitz, 2009

softly

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(C) MJ, 2009

clown girl

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she's my little clown girl. acrylics on 11 x 14 inch canvas with 3D elements.

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(C) Painting, MJ Calitz, 2009

paint me

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if i were a bird house

on top of a bench

paint me with flowers

thirsty & pink

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(C) photographs, MJ Calitz 2008. photo art & verse, MJ, 2009

pLay

If you've been wondering why I've been so scarce the last week or three, here's your answer…or at least part of it :-P… I've been busy with some art projects, playing with paint, paper, wood, canvas, fabric, beads, etc. & I will reveal them as I go. The rainy weather has been both a blessing and a curse, giving me time to sit down and create, but also slowing the process down (trust me, humidity is not a friend of paints, glues & fixatives.)
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So here's a piece I call [blueX9]. It still needs to be finished with a fixative, but for the most part, it is done. It's roughly 8 x 11 inches, acrylics on paper, glued onto blocked, sanded & painted hardboard. The 3D elements are string & dried paint from paint tube caps.

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If you click on the 3rd picture (to enlarge) you will get a better idea of the texture, which I created by roughing up the paper a bit while gluing & randomly scraping wet medium with an old credit card or dabbing with a piece of cloth. I layered black gel pen & different dilutions of blue, red, gold & white acrylic paint, using stamps, stencils & brushes, until I got the effect that I wanted.

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doN't be afraid to pLay with painT

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(C) Art, MJ Calitz, 2009

time is a verb

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the time it takes for a car door to rust

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for weeds to grow tall

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for the clouds to pass so you can take a picture of the shadows those weeds make on the rusted car

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or to catch a ray of sun on the bumper

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time is a verb.

patience is the lesson.

and the pay off,

is beauty

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(C) words & photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

how super!

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nail polish ?(!)
on a boy ???
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& wHy noT?
it makes the eyes poP
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:-P
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the original black & white photograph (not shown here) of my nephew, Gideon, was taken by a family member. it was so darling, i couldn't resist playing with the image.

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

i. flower

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like yellow & butterfly...i can't quite describe the way you make me thrive...like sunshine in paint on blues & grayish greens, you make me queen. & sometimes i blur a little. but you always shine a light on me

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(C) words & photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

vintage

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two weeks ago one of my friends made me a very happy girl. he put a camera in my hands (or a fairy box, as the folks at the renaissance festival kept reminding me) and gave me permission to roam his backyard and take as many photographs as my heart wished. keeping in mind that his backyard contains a barn as well as half a dozen old cars, i was in fairy box heaven for a couple of hours. this was my favorite FAVORITE picture of the day. i almost can't believe that i took it. watch this space. more will most definitely follow...

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(C) Photograph, MJ Calitz, 2009

treasure

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i found treasure...papers, fabrics, yarns, trims & rusted things. some in craft shops, some from home, more from friends who knows that i'm collecting these things. when i saw this little rusted gun, i wanted to eternalize it inside a nest of paper & creamy texture, like this...

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

gather ye merry skirts

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Renaissance festival, Harveysburg, OH
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(C) Photographs, MJ Calitz, 2009

inside the cake fairy's soul

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009 (click on pic to enlarge)

the colors we possess

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we made love in my mind

& i saw

all the colors of the rainbow

explode

inside

my skin

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

carved

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somehow your face got carved into the light & hard of my days. and i had to take a picture

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(C) Photograph, MJ Calitz, 2009

journey rocks!

Okay, i don't normally post music videos on my blog, but there is always an exception, yes?

Last night we went to a concert of Journey with their seXy new lead singer Arnel Pineda. They opened with an aWesome cover of Foreigner's "hot blooded," ROCKED out songs like "wheel in the sky" & "seperate ways" and meLted hearts with "faithfully." Here are videos of my favorite two songs of the evening"...

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"anyway you want" (with a stunning guitar solo by Neil Schon)

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&
"lights"

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peace out
mj

love & lace

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i am not a doLL.
i've decided that
a long time ago
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but
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porcelain & lace. bLack lace
is how i feel some days
about this stillborn thing
we insiSt on calling "love"
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or. like a raggedy anne
with no arms
permanent smile sewed on
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he stabs me with words
pouring from his aRtless soul
& i become the invisible child again
& i grieve. & i smiLe
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i used to think that love was
a magical ballooN
with layers of depth & delight
liFting you. up. up. uP
but you. you cut me doWn
without regard. & i fall
& i grieve. & i smile
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how can you deny me my souL,
walk away
& then return hours later
wanting to maKe love?
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i am noT a doll
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today i sat down & found my focus.

take back your arms &
believe in yourself.
if i can do it,
so can you
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(C) Words & art, MJ Calitz, 2009

a drop of nothing

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do you sometimes get that feeling too? the one where the moment right after you think you got it, you realize, that you got nothing but a drop on parched lips...

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[i call these pictures "what do you mean? duo 1 & 2"]

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(C) Photographs, MJ Calitz, 2008

inspiration cross

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"inspiration cross" - acrylics on wood embellished with papers, fabrics, beads, ribbons, etc. including antique lace and a hat pin from my creative grandmother

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i made this cross to remind me to love my life, live in the moment and embrace my creative side.

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

draw a chair

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

about the journey

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this was not supposed to be anything. i was just experimenting with different inks, paints & techniques and then it started to look like something so i kept going and before it was done, i realized that art [life] [love] is more about the journey than the final product.

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as i make these things for you that are born inside the depths of my soul, love drips from my fingertips like vanilla ice cream melting in the summer sun. dripping. dripping. seeping through my pores. deep deep down. no, it doesn't matter that i sometimes choose not to eat dessert because you have branded me with your dark chocolate love. love. love, i will always. be. yours.
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…even when i'm not making something for you, i remember that you love autumn leaves.
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(C) Art & words, MJ Calitz, 2009

morning light

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morning light. fog paints the air ethereal. butterflies hang on the willow tree like two upside down hearts still asleep while flowers wake up taking thirsty sips of dew. the beauty of it all takes my breath away

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(C) Photographs & words, MJ Calitz, 2009

rules for surviving

when you're a butterfly

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1.
don't be a zoMbie loveR
stuck to the liPs of
a god chiseled out of
starduSt & cliMb my limbs
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2.
don'T forget
that he has feet of cLay.
& for god sake
doN't fall at his feet
starving clinging
caRving angel wings
on his back
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don't eat out of his haNds &
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4.
whaTever you do
don't feed him blOwn kisses
taSting like hoPe because
they have the tendency
to bouNce back
& hiT you in the heart
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No.
this
is
noT
what
this
is
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thiS is
don't look into the fUture
lest you tuRn into a deer
caught in the headlighTs
frOzen in stone
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yeS, i am still a butterfLy.
but that doeSn't mean
that i should fLitter
to faSt forward
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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009. art, mj, 2009

inadvertent & reaL

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but she shiNes!?! even the sun spins pure gold threads in her haiR, you say, shivering & confused. just call her goLdilocks. (that's the faiRytale anyway.) but soMe days. she locks you out with her lashes. the saMe lashes that kiSsed your eyes, touched your souL your heart your ear, crawled iNside & stayed without invitation. & you search but you can't fiNd the keyhole & her barbwire tongue, sO pretty, so pink, inadvertently cuTs you in 2. too far away. you want to remeMber the kisses. but they burSt against your i. effervescent. ephemeral. eveR elusive…illusive.
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truth? nobody knows the damn truth. aLL we can do is be here…BE HERE & be reaL
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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

press play

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she stands in front of the mirror. feeling heavy. feeling unsure of what comes next. the morning light has always been healing & kind. press play. the music begins. she closes her eyes, let it wash over her. her body knows what to do. she begins to move. it just feels good dancing to gypsy guitars, the beat of ancient lovers echoing on her soul in double sway. she is woman. her hips celebrate. black slip slides on skin. wild hair flies sticks cascades. she bites her lip. smiles. crows feet. eyes invite. hold secrets only lovers should find. find the rhythm inside you. it doesn't matter if you don't know the steps. just dance!

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(C) MJ Calitz, 2009

thank you

thank you SO much for all the birthday wishes! i am truly blessed.

watch this movie: the ugly truth (hilarious)
eat here: Logan's Roadhouse & the Cheesecake Factory (both receives a "yum" from me)