the wheel in the sky, I tell ya

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Got these songs from Alanis Morissettes's Jagged little pill acoustic album on the anniversary of my late brother's birthday... "Mary Jane" "Wake up" and "You learn"...like little gifts penetrating my mind. Made me sit up and go "...wow" ...wheels are turning.

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be vulnerable. be strong.

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This post started as:
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Instead of sitting on a heap crying about how your life didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to, why don’t you have an honest conversation with God about it and see what happens.
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Instead of wishing your life was different and judging all the people in it (including yourself), why don't you realize that the past and the people couldn’t have been any different and find it in yourself to forgive.
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And then it grew into:
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If you are struggling with self worth and allowing yourself to be abused in any shape, way or form...find your worth inside, so that it doesn't matter what others do. So that you don't allow another's actions to define you, confine you, diminish you, destroy you. So that you don't need to go search for acceptance in dangerous places or feel that you have no other choice but to stay in it. Choose to act from a place of love (and self love) instead of fear and running away. Allow yourself to see your abuser's vulnerability, remove his/her power over you and forgive both your abuser and yourself. Take a moment to sink into the hurt, the shame, the fear. Acknowledge it...all of it. Then choose to let it go. And live your life from a place of love. Be vulnerable. Be strong. Set yourself free.
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If you have become an angry person...You are never angry for the reason you think you are. What is really the deeper issue? Anger is a manifestation of fear. Fear of what? Fear of rejection. Fear of loss of control. Fear of vulnerability. Anger is a defense mechanism. It's also an energy that you send out. Choose to send positive energy into the universe instead of negative. ["Don't put anything out in God's universe that you can't look in the mirror and be proud of. Stop it." - Iyanla Vanzant"] Choose to react from a place of love, not a place of fear. Fear breeds anger, breeds hurt. Choose to stop the cycle of hurt. Be vulnerable. Be strong. Set yourself free.
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ALSO:
“Create what you want as apposed to being stuck in what you didn’t have.” - Iyanla Vanzant -
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(C) Photograph/art MJ Calitz, 2010& 2011

one step forward

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I did it. I finally opened my online etsy shop. It may seem small, but to me, it's a giant step forward. from being passive. from being "almost an artist"...to the possibility of an income (however small)...and sending my art into the world to be enjoyed by others. It's movement.
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I invite you to browse @
http://www.etsy.com/shop/foreverAlice
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ps...why foreverAlice? If you know me from Studio8, you'll know. if not...think "Alice in wonderland"
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(C) MJ Calitz, 2011